Citron Bee

2008-06-23T23:35:00.000-07:00

Looooong blog entry ahead. I'm compensating for a lack of recent activity. Guys do it all the time too, just turn a blind eye if you don't like it.:P

Today was productive, at least compared to most of my days. I did laundry, dishes, swept, did more grocery shopping (I need to find less expensive hobbies), and went and got more books from the library. I love reading and cooking. I finished The Golden Compass last night, and all I have to say is that a) that book is sure as hell not the children's book I thought it was, and b) Lord Asriel (and pretty much every major adult in that book) is a dick. Seriously, total dick. I was still kind of disappointed, because I read The Subtle Knife when I was younger and loved it, but Golden Compass never really seemed that exciting. Maybe because it's really bloody disturbing or maybe because I'm older, but aside from the philosophies and the third "book" of the book, it was really slow going. I'd tell you all to just go ahead and read the last third, because it's pretty wicked cool, aside from Lord Asriel being a dick, but there's so much mucky backstory leading up to it that reading the last third out of context is akin to tossing an 11-year-old into the middle of an orgy and saying "Go."

Okay, maybe not quite like that, but it's similar, and thematic, because 11-year-olds get manhandled a whole lot in that book. Mostly because all the adults are dicks.

BUT now I have new books. I went to get A Clockwork Orange, Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?, and One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest, and left with those three along with three other novels by Phillip K. Dick (last name not an attempt to continue my Golden Compass motif, I promise) and Dresden Files: Storm Front, because I figure now that my buddy has me addicted to those books I may as well try and read them in sort-of order, and Storm Front's the first of them.

Also I'm pretty sure I was the only girl in the science fiction section. Although considering there were maybe two other people besides librarians, it's not a phenomenal statistic.

I also went on a food adventure through three different stores and markedly different neighborhoods. That was fun and now I have freaking bajillions of ingredients for basically everything ever, provided it doesn't require meat or butter. Wednesday is going to be crazy cooking day.

Also I closed at work, and I'm bloody tired. There was a lady came in about half an hour before closing, and I swear she must've been drugged like no other on something. Talked so quietly I had to get six inches from her face to even venture a guess at what she was trying to order (eight minutes and one wrong drink later I deduced America with soy milk and brownies). Then she spent literally twenty minutes counting her change and realizing she didn't have enough, so could we put the brownies back and I just didn't charge her for the soy. She was really nice and appreciative, which is a sight more than can be said for some of our customers, but something about her made me nervous down to my bones, and I was dead-walking tired for the rest of work. Still am.

Then right before closing this girl came in for a white mocha and actually wanted whipped cream on it. Which is kind of like saying a elephant came in on a unicycle singing God Save the Queen in a flawless Canadian accent (and by God, if that ever does happen I will die happy). Seriously, no girl over 12 except me ever gets whipped cream on anything, and whipped cream is delicious. But apparently whipped cream was going to make her day, so I made her the small mocha she ordered in a medium cup and just filled the rest with whipped cream. She was a damn happy camper, too.

Now I'm debating bragging to my friend/coworker Marc about how much better I am at flirting with girls that he is.

2008-06-22T21:13:00.000-07:00

There was this really cute little girl at Starbucks today (where I spent all day on register) who bought a little coffee frappuchino from me at one point. I thought it was a little weird that her parents weren't around, because she looked about nine years old, but I figured either it was allowance day or they were just hiding cleverly in the woodwork. Anyways, point is, she bought a small frappuchino, which is oddly disciplined for anyone and certainly for a nine-year-old. Later, though, in proper child form, she came back for more. She looked over the entire pastry case, then called me over and asked how much the toffee cookie bars we have are. $2, because everything at Starbucks is overpriced. She thought for a moment, counted her change and asked if she could just get a croissant. Then her dad, who'd followed her over this time and was apparently proud of her for not begging money off of him, hopped into the conversation and handed her some change, saying warmly "Here, I'll pay for the extra," and then, looking at me, "Go ahead and get her the bar she wants."

"Do you like toffee?" I asked, fishing around for the biggest, toffeefullest (not a word) bar in the case while she nodded happily.

"Yeah, get her a big one," Dad laughed. I gave her the cookie and her change and she ran off while her dad ordered a triple espresso.

"Go ahead and charge him for a double," my buddy Shawn, who was working bar, piped up. It was about then that the weird thing about the girl trotting off like that and being so shy around her dad actually occurred to me.

The guy wasn't her dad. He was just the guy behind her in line. Grinning ear to ear, I rang him up, and, since we always pull two shots a time and just happened to have a fourth lying around, we wound up giving him a quad espresso instead.

"It's a karma thing," Shawn laughed. Tell me about it.

2008-06-16T22:46:00.000-07:00

Whenever you're really feeling like shit, just think of this: no matter where in the world you are, you are walking on an unfathomably hot, roiling sphere of molten magma. And probably dinosaur fossils.

I mean really, how can you still feel bad knowing that?

Tomorrow is my first day completely off since I started working again, and I can't wait. I'm going to get lots done, be productive, watch a movie with Forrest and hopefully finish this book I'm reading. A friend of mine found out I was making a summer reading list and said I should give the Dresden Files series a go. I started on the third book because the library didn't have the first one in, but it's awesome anyways. I mean, what's not to like about mixing modern-day magic and detective novels?

Yeah, that's what I thought. Nothing. I recommend them if you're a big shameless nerd like me.:)

2008-06-15T20:40:00.000-07:00

I got to sleep in for the first time today in about two weeks. By sleep in I mean sleep until 7, but MAN was it awesome. I felt so good.

I'm still unpacking at my new place. I love how it looks now that I'm setting up home, because it really is a home. I'm almost tempted not to put in much more furniture because I like how big and open it is, but I know it'll just seem empty once I have all the crap that's piled up in the living room put away and there's all that freed floorspace. Also I kind of need for, you know, a TV and couch. So I can have people over who don't just wind up sitting on my bed. Or laying on it. Or in it. I suspect my apartment's not going to wind up as much like Vegas as I'd planned though, now that all my guy friends are getting girlfriends. What's up with that, anyways?

I worked my first full 8-hour day at Starbucks today. 8 hours there is a lot more tiring than 10 in the park service, which is weird since it's much lighter labor. It was fun though. I've been there almost a month now, but it doesn't feel like that at all. It's really weird; I feel like I should know everything and I definitely don't. Today someone spilled a mocha frap all over the floor and I had to mop it up, and when I finished and headed back I accidentally left little size 6 Citron mocha footprints all along the floor.

The water in my apartment complex is turned off right now because of a plumbing problem that's hopefully getting fixed tomorrow. Luckily I have random water stored all over the place, but I'm taking my water bottles to work tomorrow to fill up just in case.:P

I had leftover pizza and fries with green tea for dinner. Green tea and pizza taste really lousy together. Seriously, don't try it.

I said don't try it, dammit!

2008-06-12T21:47:00.000-07:00

Finals are over! Over! O-VER!

But I have to be up at 3:30 tomorrow to get to work, so I'll bombard you charming cats with updates from the past few weeks o' crazy later...

But finals are over!

2008-06-01T21:13:00.000-07:00

I am so tired of homework! There's so damn much of it! Finals are everywhere! Work is everywhere! Apartment hunting is everywhere! Money is nowhere!

I've been really scatterbrained lately, probably because of all the things I've been trying to juggle. I went and looked at another studio today and loved it- I got my application in right after work and I'm sending her my credit report tomorrow, so I really really hope she'll give me the place. It's big and bright and has a giant closet I could use as a workroom, and, and, and... :daydream:

There's this really awesome guy called Damien at work who's one of my supervisors. He loves how into games I am and he's always asking about my classes and where I would work if I could choose any studio. And he likes to talk about GTA4 a lot. I haven't played a GTA in a long time, but everyone seems to love this one, and I've done enough research and review-reading to be able to chat it up with him. We have fun conversations.

I always thought that the last part of the Christmas carol was "Oh what Daddy would have been if he could have only seen Mommy kissing Santa Claus." It turns out it's not, but up until 90 seconds ago I didn't know that. Anyways, because my brain likes to wander out into uncharted regions with absolutely no permission from me whatsoever, I spent my entire 10 minute break wondering what Daddy would have been. Jealous? Hurt? Murderous? Encouraged by the fact that he could get as old and fat as humanly possible and his tasty little dish of a wife would STILL hop him?

I like people to be happy, so I decided it should be the last one.

Anyways, Damien put me on bar today taking care of all the hot drinks on my own... I'm glad he was there to tell me ingredients though, or I would have botched a lot of drinks... BUT I survived the whole thing and didn't spill anything or take too horribly long or get any complaints or returned drinks.
It's also a good thing most people where just ordering chai and lattes with different milks, because I am the milk-steaming master.
We close really early on Sundays (as coffee shops tend to), and they were missing a guy, so I helped out. It's fun actually doing stuff instead of standing around learning out of a book.:D

Homework!!! I've already done two animations today and I still have so much more to do... BLAAAGH.

2008-05-31T22:07:00.000-07:00

I had a really boring "introduction to the company" thing at the Starbucks headquarters today. I totally owned everyone at drawing new coffee stamps, not that that matters at all, but that was still a pretty lame activity... It was mostly those happy videos about how great the company is and what a bright future we all have and how we all might as well just be swallowing rainbows.

Now I'm getting a mental image of that and let me tell you, it is WEIRD. Oh god, new mental image! Bad brain, BAD!!

:cough:

Annnnyways.....

I decided to take the bus to HQ in the morning, on account that it looked to be about a two-hour walk. I got to the bus kind of early, though. Being that it was, by happy coincidence, Saturday morning, all of the Evangelicals and anti-abortionists were lined up outside the Planned Parenthood right across the way. Whenever there are protesters out there, girls who work at PP stand outside, partially as safety escorts and partially, I imagine, out of pride for what they do. I've been meaning to go over and stand with them for a while now, and since I had some time I finally got to today. The protesters kept praying together for God to forgive us and save us from hell... Which makes them a lot nicer than a lot of the people who protest there, but it's getting hard for me to keep track of who does and doesn't want me going to hell.

In any case, it was very liberating.

Back to corporate whoredom...

There was another guy already waiting outside when I got there (half an hour early). He offered to take me to coffee, so we went and chatted about college and work so far and stuff like that. He was really cool and cute and kept flirting shamelessly with me all through the workshop. Which was a shame, because when I'm at work I'm totally in work mode and flirting very rarely occurs to me as something to do. Otherwise I would have.

As it was, I couldn't stop thinking about how tall he was. He was 6 foot fucking 8! That's 19 inches taller than me! That's tall even by normal people standards (by my standards everyone is at either "tall" or "even fucking shorter than me and it's kinda scary"). I don't know why I seem to attract these phenomenally tall guys...

Ah well, he's sure a leap and a bound over Car Guy. And I know where he works.:P

I decided to walk on the way back, since I didn't feel like shelling any more money out for the bus. So I found a street leading straight back to my school and decided to just follow that, despite there being a pretty steep hill right at the beginning. Because, you see, it was also pretty short.

WRONG. Guess what folks, in San Francisco, short steep hills hide other short steep hills. And THOSE hide other short steep hills. It's a fucking wedding cake of wheeze-your-lungs-out death!

Okay, I suck at analogies. Suffice to say I overcame the wedding and carried on my merry way. However, I wouldn't suggest trying to climb any San Francisco hills. Fuck you, hills.

2008-05-30T21:37:00.000-07:00

On the way to work today I was accidentally walking pretty much abreast with this guy who I hadn't really given much look at for a couple blocks. Eventually he asked where I was headed, introductions were made and so on. He asked what I did for a living and I told him I was going to college and asked what he did.

"Oh, I'm one of those people who got hit by a car," he said, completely monotone. "So now I'm just collecting on that."

The sad part is that I'd figured out by now that he was trying to pick up on me. Who does that and then has no better way to classify themselves than "one of those people". Especially when he elaborated by explaining that he basically does nothing but sit around and live on damages.... I would go crazy without school or a job of some sort...

The conversation kinda petered out from there. We were both lousy conversationalists to begin with.

Boys are so weird.

2008-05-21T23:42:00.000-07:00

I forgot to share this story from a while ago, but it's funny (or at least I think so), so I shall share it now:

A few weeks ago I did my first ever BSDM shoot. Now there were a lot of good things and a lot of bad things about this shoot, and I'll start with the first problem I ran across, which happened before I even got to the shoot. I ride BART to all my out-of-town shoots, on account that I'm a cheap, license-less hippy and refuse to own a car. BUT, as it turns out, the BART was down between Hayward and Fremont, which (surprise!) meant spending an extra hour (which made me almost an hour late) on a jam-packed shuttle bus.

And there I was going to be proud of myself for being early. Also, I'll never understand why so many black girls wear insanely bright colors of eyeshadow, often complete with glitter. I mean sure you see it on models for shoots, on scene and fashion victims, and on other folks for special occasions or dress-ups once in a while, but I've seen so many totally normal, everyday black girls with colors I'd swear you could only find in the oil paint section at the arts and crafts store.

I sure hope they're not using oil paint. My little bro got ahold of a tube of cadmium red oil paint once when we were little and Mum had to wash it off with turpentine. Although I can't speak from experience, judging by all the screaming and crying it doesn't sound recommendable. Even if it is an awesome color of war paint.

Where was I? Oh, right, we went from BDSM to rhapsodizing about childhood memories. I love my brain sometimes.

Anyways, the shoot turned out to be a lot pornier than I thought it was going to be, which is a bit disappointing, but teach me. The main issue was the fact that the guy who acts as a dom (and is on the older side, as they inevitably are, and I've never understood why they don't bring in hot young lasses to dom instead. I'm going to assume it's for the same reason Ron Jeremy was such a popular porn star. But that's a story for a different day.) likes to employ a number of external vibrators ranging in size from what looked like the container for the world's biggest contact lenses to something very nearly the size of your average vase. Okay, that's a lie, but it was fucking huge! And also I'm getting ahead of myself. Bad brain, bad!

So I get tied up and so begins the beating. As I quickly learned, I have a phenomenally high tolerance for those rubber whip things that have about a billion little strands to them. Also, I get very spiteful when you use a riding crop on me. He was having a tough time tying the ropes properly on account of me being smaller than most of the girls he works with and the fact that he was wearing gloves. So, as he finished up one batch of ropework and started shouting manly things like "Can you get out of that? Can you get out of that? HUH? You can't, can you?" I chortled and managed to work a wrist free, then bolted to the other end of the very large warehouse we were shooting in.

I had to do an arms-only suspension bondage at one point, and let me tell you, they royally suck. I had bruiseson the insides of my elbows and one arm felt half-asleep for days afterwards. The basic idea is that you get your arms looped around a pole attached to the ceiling and tied, and then you have to hang there supported entirely by your arms. That blew. Then he made me do one where I twisted the rope up and then hung while it untwisted itself, at which point I got so amused by the spinning that I started laughing like a kid. Which kinda broke the damsel in distress thing he was going for, I think.

Finally, we did a normal(?) suspension bondage where I was completely hanging from the ceiling. At this point he took to fully whaling on my with the rubber whip, to no avail, and complaining about how little noise I was making. Call me crazy, but I found the suspension incredibly meditative. I had to concentrate primarily on breathing because most of my weight was being supported from ropes around my chest, and there's something about being so aware of your own heaviness and simultaneously almost floating that's very peaceful. I'm beyond weird, I know.

Eventually he decided that, in lieu of whip-induced noise, he was just going to have to take the porn root and stick a giant vibrator on me.

Now I apologize for ruining any fantasies out there, but it's really hard to get me to orgasm. He'd already tried using the giant contact lens case earlier with no luck, and then declared that by the end of the day he was going to get me to orgasm at least 6 times. So when this vibrator, which was about the size of a 16 oz. water bottle, did absolutely nothing, he also got to find out the hard way that I cannot, for all my years of acting and sexing, fake an orgasm. Go figure.

I started laughing so hard at him then that all the air got blocked out of my lungs by the ropes on my rib cage. I started choking and they had to cut me down.

In short, it was awesome. And despite making every effort to be a royal pain in the ass, he gave me an extra $100 and asked me to come back some time. And bought me french fries at Hooters.

Men are so weird.

2008-05-19T23:39:00.000-07:00

For how much I've been keeping busy the past four days, I really don't feel like I've accomplished very much...

I start work tomorrow, and I'm going out to sushi and a movie with Forrest.

Hopefully tomorrow will be better. I need hugs.

2008-05-18T21:19:00.000-07:00

Today I broke down to a combination of stress and lack of anything but vegetables and soy products in the house (I'm serious, that's all I had) and went to the store to get chips, bread and brie.

I felt guilty for it (still do), partially for spending money on junk food and partially for, well, buying junk food. The lady in front of me in line, though, had six packs of cookies and soda pop, a package of Milano cookies, a pint of Hagen-Daz, a box of Drumstick ice creams, two packages of M&Ms and some other crap.

I felt better then.

Also, I finally bothered looking up the name of my favorite cheese in the world, because the brand name is Port Salut, but the wrapper, shelf sticker and receipt all just say "French soft cheese," and even my chef buddies had no idea what it was.

It turns out it's just Port Salut cheese. I'm oddly put out by that.

2008-05-15T19:10:00.000-07:00

My mum has a neighbor couple in her new neighborhood who have a little boy. She was hanging out with them the other day and told the kid that I'm studying to make video games, and he gasped and asked "Did she invent Link?"

What an awesome little kid, seriously. So now I'm mentally swaggering around feeling bad-ass. Nevermind that Mum's answer was "No, but I'll bet she wishes she had." I still feel cool now.

Speaking of cool, it's been ranging all over the 80's today and it's killing me. San Francisco is not living up to its promised stereotype as a miserably chilly and foggy city and I'm very disappointed in it. But it's okay, I love it anyways.

I basically didn't move or do anything at all until around five today. Then I went to Subway and wolfed down a footlong like I hadn't gotten laid in a year. I also gypped them out of 41 cents because I only had a five when I thought I'd brought $6.

I always thought gypped was spelled "jipped" and just found out today via a friend that it's not, and that it's actually a reference to gypsies and their rather light hands. Fun fact.

I found out today that I now have a job and I start Tuesday. I'm really excited about that.:D It'll be the first time I've had a job in like, two years.:cough: Also, I'm starting to make calls tomorrow looking for a place. Should be interesting.

The only problem with all this, of course, is that I probably won't be able to make any trips during the summer break to visit family and friends. I'm hoping maybe I'll have enough money and a few days off where I can fly all over to visit people for like, a day each, but we'll see. Mum can come down and visit me and sleep in my bed, I'd totally sleep on the couch for her sake (her reaction to this was: "You're going to have a couch?") Things always work out for the best.:D

2008-05-13T23:50:00.001-07:00

I had another shoot today- my fourth this week. Four rounds of modeling in a week is too much for me, I've decided. Or maybe it was just because most of them were pretty lame.

Today's was fun because A) I got to play with makeup, and it looked fucking awesome, and B) I was in a professional dom's studio for the shoot, and so all her stuff was still out. I had some rainbow makeup on and I grabbed this awesome vase full of multi-color grasses to pose with, and my photographer looked at me and was like "You know those are whips, right?"

Kinda killed it for me. But there's tons of awesome and scary stuff there and it makes me happy. She has a glass cane for beating people and a glass dildo and they make me want to cry and hide in a corner.:D

I went and hung out with Forrest and his roommate and got my ass kicked at Mario Kart. Then I went to school and worked on my 3D final and said hi to Mr. Awesome Teacher to find out what the textbooks are for his class that I'm taking next quarter.

Next quarter is going to be awesome. And murderously busy. Especially if I get a job like I should be soon!:D

Oh, yeah, I found out from Forrest that both the girl who've called me in for interviews were the ones who he used to work with and loved him to little Forrest bits. And here I was being proud of myself for supposedly doing well on my interviews, but NO, it's just because I had Forrest as a reference.

Ah well, if I get a job I don't really care.:P Hell, even as it is I don't really care.

I started out my being back home-ness by avoiding homework, but now I'm semi-stuck listening to my drunk friend rant about everything he hates about his fiance. I don't get young engagements, I really don't. I mean sure, most of them are going to wind up divorced anyways, but by then they'll be bitter and past their prime. Get varied sex NOW, while you still can! More easily, at least.

No bias, I swear.

2008-05-08T23:52:00.000-07:00

I woke up this morning drenched in sweat and not feeling all that great.

Several hours of sleep later, I woke up feeling strangely fine, got to school all kinds of later and finished out the day pretty strong. I hung out with one of my teachers for half an hour after class and it was awesome. She's all kinds of crazy in the best way possible.

My roommate kinda just walked into our room earlier and gave me a giant cupcake of awesomeness. It was about 60% pure chocolate and 40% frosting; the ratio of cupcake to frosting was honestly somewhere around 4:3. It was insane, delicious, and took me two sittings to finish it.

I have two job interviews tomorrow and I am nervous! I really want a job so I can have money and a better chance of getting a good apartment when I move out and get my own place.

Although I've been getting so many offers for paid shoots lately that even if only a few don't flake out I'll be making some decent money... It's just not really reliable or make me look good as a potential renter, so... Yeah. Wish me luck on my interviews!:D

2008-05-07T23:23:00.000-07:00

You would not believe the things you find in Goodwills around San Francisco. Forrest and I were hanging out in Japantown and he never knew there was a Goodwill right there, so we wound up going inside. I found these cork-sole wedge-heeled (both of which I hate) sandals with these awesome red striped bows at the base. They're great pin-up shoes, I think. I also found seven-inch heeled platform white-and-black patent leather boots. So I bought both for future sets, for $15.

What's not to love? I got goofy, set-worthy shoes for super-cheap.

Other than that my day was a giant ball of stress, but I don't remember most of it except my awesome new shoes.

2008-05-04T23:11:00.000-07:00

Today was a good day. I spent the first three quarters of it feeling kinda crappy- did dishes and was finally getting ready to sit down and be productive when the roomies came home, which always puts a damper on things. So I sat around and was largely useless, occasionally doing homework here and there and mostly feeling lousy for not doing more. I watched part of a marathon of America's Next Top Model, since my roommates watch that. I really like looking at the fashion ideas they come up with and the actual modeling- the girly drama can fall off the face of the earth and slowly, painfully explode into oblivion for all I care, though.

Anyways, I digress. In short, the first part of my day sucked.

BUT.

Then I messaged my buddy who's birthday is tomorrow. I consider him one of my better friends, but he's one of Forrest's roommates, which means that I've only seen him once in the past few months since I'm not allowed over there because Forrest's girlfriend is a jealous nut. Anyways, I texted asking if there was a time I could drop of his birthday present and he said he was home right now. When I got there, he invited me up, although I was pretty sure Girlie had the day off as well. Sure enough, while we were in the elevator he glanced at me and said "By the way, uh, Girlie's home, just so you're warned. I already told her you're coming up and she gave me one of those really dirty looks. She's such an angry kid."

"Yeah, I'd heard she's been grouchy," I said, laughing. He likes making people uncomfortable- I could tell right then he and the rest of the guys in the apartment were going to find this whole thing hilarious.

"Oh, so he's [Forrest's] still talking to you, then?" I nodded. "That's good," he said approvingly. Although I'm not particularly close with this guy, I've always really liked him, but he's such an indescriminate jackass I've always had a hard time telling if he really considered me much of a friend in return. Being that this is the first time he's ever offered up such a blatantly caring attitude towards me while sober, it meant a lot.

So we hung out, watched some TV and played Brawl (my second time, his six billionth, for despite that both the Wii and game are mine, all of my console stuff lives at their house), got TV and watched some more TV. It wasn't epicly exciting, but he gave me the chance to smash down the wall of being shut off from that household, and it was awesome to see all the guys there again.

The girlfriend, needless to say, was a bit past pissy the entire time. I'm not sure if it was because of me or not, though; she's always sort of like that.

Anyways, I had fun, laughed a lot, got real hugs and finally got to see my friends. It was pretty damn awesome.:)

So there's my cheerful drama. I'm going to go get cocoa and wait for Forrest's panicked phone call.

2008-05-02T18:46:00.001-07:00

Midterms are finally over, thank god. I'm pretty sure I rocked them, for the most part, so I'm happy. Now onto another, slightly lighter week of homework. Which means I have more time to spend fixing old assignments for better grades. My teachers are awesome like that.

And my photoshoot tomorrow! I'm so excited. Excited excited EXCITED.
And all you perverts out there can just keep your dirty thoughts to yourselves.:P

Today I went and closed most of my Bank of America accounts, because they suck. Then, to prove how much they suck, they informed me that I actually have $90 in various fees due that my online account never saw fit to inform me of, so I have to go back tomorrow and deposit that before I can close the last damned one. This also means I have no more spending money for this month, so it's a good thing I did my gift shopping for the month before that. It also means I didn't have to go see Ironman. The movie I don't give two shits about. I'm kinda bummed I didn't get to hang out with my buddy there though; I haven't spent any time with him since we broke up.:P

So my day has been fairly busy and productive. I went on an epic hunt for Mother's Day presents that covered basically all of Powell and Westfield. It's incredibly hard to find a Mother's Day card that isn't either nauseatingly gooshy or obnoxiously self-congratulatory. But I managed to find a cute one that had some personal irony as well, so that's always good. And it only took two stores and a full hour to find.

Other than that, I picked up bath supplies for her and a Gamestop card for a buddy of mine who's birthday is soon.

After all my monetary adventures, I went to school and did some homework. Yes, on a Friday. It makes me feel like a happy dorky nerd.

And now homework continues. Happy evening to all.:P

2008-04-28T23:37:00.000-07:00

I've been very productive the past few days. Which is damn good, too, because I have midterms coming up Wednesday and Thursday....

One of my roommates is completely addicted to TV, and at this point she's run out of shitty soap operas for the night so she's watching CNN. Which means that all these wonderful stories of God saving people and God taking care of the economy and God inspiring people to teach their parents how wrong homosexuality is and blah blah blah are managing to worm their way through all my awesome video game music.

I have nothing against God, but I have a lot against those who think that God has something against everyone but them.

I have a photoshoot this weekend with Wandering Spirit. He e-mailed me offering a few days ago and I'm super duper excited. My last shoot with Grog's Photography went great and I get the feeling this one's going to be even better, even taking out the mosquito factor.

I helped the tiniest, prettiest little Asian-Hawaiian girl I've ever seen out a little with her Maya today. I wish I could get her to model with me.:(

I need to find model friends to play with...

2008-04-27T23:59:00.000-07:00

Today I saw a jackrabbit, a fawn, a gopher snake, a bluebelly lizard and some ducks during my photoshoot. It was all kinds of awesome. I also got eaten alive my mosquitoes. Which isn't awesome at all. And then I camped out on the couch because I felt like I should get SOME fun out of all my stupid bites.

BUT.

The photos I've seen so far are pretty awesome, aside from all the mosquito bite welts.

Midterms are next week! This is going to be a busy weekend...

2008-04-26T21:02:00.000-07:00

My roommate just walked in while I was sitting on my bed at my laptop with my pants around my ankles.

I can only imagine what she's thinking, but I'm too lazy to explain just now that I'm putting rubbing alcohol on my mosquito bites.

I'm editing some of the photos from my shoot yesterday right now, and it's going to be awesome.

Then I'm going to do more homework, because I slept for three hours of the day on account of really really bad nausea. Seriously, it didn't matter if I had Sour Patch Kids for breakfast (yes, I'm horrible) or a whole wheat burrito for lunch, NOTHING was settling my stomach. Except sleep, apparently.

Sammiches of tomato, honey mustard, fried tofu, parmesan, spinach and salt and pepper are my new friend.

Back to editing my nudie photos.:D

2008-04-18T20:28:00.001-07:00

I went to Pacific Heights today, because I felt like being surrounded by yuppies and their small dogs. The affluence up there still scares me a little, but there are lots of cool restaurants, and something about how clean it is makes me very happy.

Anyways, I found a makeup store there that sells lipstick in several shamelessly rich shades of green, blue, yellow and orange. It just about gave me a makeup orgasm. (Which is basically one of those times when you're on the verge of starting then it stops, leaving you vaguely pleased for getting that far but still totally unsatisfied. That's the best makeup can really do for me unless someone's doing body art.) Now I have another horribly expensive specialty store to go to for horribly bright colors of makeup.

Part of why modeling's fun for me is because I get to be interested in everything that girly girls love (makeup, clothes, underwear, shoes, blah blah blah), and use it in ways they would never even dream of because it's so damn ridiculous. Or overtly sexual. Or both, which is the best, of course.

The rest of the time, I'll be happily working on video games and whatnot.

2008-04-17T20:10:00.000-07:00

Yesterday morning I woke up extra-early, because I needed to finish some homework.

"I should cut my hair," I though to myself.

So I gave myself a 15-minute bob in my roommate's bathroom mirror with a pair of paper scissors. Frankly, I think I did a damn good job, too. The beau likes it, at least.:P

This morning I fell asleep, because after really stressful afternoon I feel sleep for four hours and then couldn't sleep all night. Got woken up the constant shrieking of the building-wide fire alarm test. Went back to sleep, had a nightmare that I overslept, woke up and caught the bus to school.

I dropped my hardest class, not because I don't think I could pass it, but because simply "passing" isn't good enough and I'd rather do really well in all my other classes than meh in all of them. Other than that, things are going well. I'll still be busy, but less crazy busy. I went and talked to my teacher for the class afterwards and he was really cool about it, so that was nice.

I've been coming up with lots of awesome set ideas lately and I can't wait to try them out. BUT I have to for a lot of them, because my favorite photographer is booked until the end of May...

Ah well. There's more to do until then!:)

2008-04-15T22:05:00.001-07:00

Yesterday I rescued a little boy's hat from the wind.

Then today my photographer was running late, so I went to the Goodwill up the block. I found a mobile phone on the ground and went to stand in line to give it to the cashier. When I said someone had dropped it next to the column, the lady right behind me in line (who was carrying nothing, so I can only assume she was hoping someone had dropped off the phone already) exclaimed "Hey, that's my phone!" And she was all happy, and I gave it to her and left feeling extremely happy. She ran after me outside and asked if I wanted her to buy me something as thanks for returning it. I said no, but it was really awesome of her.

Lots of events lately have been convincing me that everything happens for a reason. Yes, Citron, the rampant cynical realist, is starting to be convinced of karma and fate.

Which fails to explain why good things keep happening to me, but ah well.:P

I made 250 bucks at my photo shoot today. I bought myself a Panda bowl in celebration (actually because all I'd had to eat before then was a small bowl of cereal eight hours earlier and was really hungry). I'm going to pick myself up some real makeup for modeling and cheap supplies for some photosets I want to do in celebration. I figure it makes sense to put some of my modeling money towards stuff to improve my shoots, right?:P

But yeah, I have $440 just sitting around the house right now. It's great.

I've decided to make a self-improvement theme for each month. This month's was going to be make less of my humor sex-related, but that's too hard to start out with, so now I need a new one.

2008-04-13T20:53:00.000-07:00

San Francisco is officially trying to kill me. It's been in the high 70's for a couple days straight now, and it sucks. Today I spent all day lounging around being useless, doing homework and avoiding the heat as much as possible (which isn't very possible in our stupid apartment).

I have paid shoots the next two days, which is really nice. Money! All starving college students like money, right?:P

My dad called me up earlier today asking what I'd thought of the Cherry Blossom Festival over in Japantown. I told him I hadn't gone yet, and he sort of went quiet before saying "Okay, well, I'll talk to you later sweetie." and hanging up. That made me feel loved.-_-

Anyways, I have to stop avoiding homework, because there is, as per usual, a lot of it to do.

The guy I'm shooting with tomorrow has the same name as one of my exes who I still talk with a lot. That's going to be interesting.><

2008-04-12T12:39:00.001-07:00

I've somehow gotten myself addicted to Portal's ending theme, "Still Alive." I'm assuming it's just my obsession with the absurd, because the lyrics of this song are ridiculous to the point of giving They Might Be Giants a run for their money.

Okay, that's an overstatement. But the song makes me feel like a total nerd (not that that takes much), which instantly makes it a great song.

Anyways, that's not actually the reason I'm writing right now. The *real* reason I'm writing is to brag about my amazing budgeting abilities. I did my weekly(ish) grocery shopping last night and came home with a giant bag full of decently healthy food (certainly enough to comfortably last the week, provided I don't scarf it all down in my usual manner) for $24.

On a side note, the bag I used to transport those groceries is fucking awesome. It's pretty much your generic tote, except I got it in Japantown for $1.50, and it's covered in cutesily-drawn hedgehogs and Engrish words that the Japanese associate with hedgehogs, such as "grass", "spine", "snuffle", "prickly", "hedgehog" (of all things), and best of all, "spickly ball". At first I though they got "prickly" and "spiky" confused, but then I realized that "prickly" was already properly used on the bag, so now I'm just back to feeling like a smug speaker of proper American English (triple oxymoron).

Anyways, back to the food. I got stuff for Greek salads, crackers and lemon soda (which I already drank all of), pizza stuff and veggies. Today I prepped most of it: I made highly successful tofu Parmesan (successful being defined as delicious and non-mushy), chopped all the salad greens and set off on my quest to make the world's best fucking pizza. Being that I bought a premade whole wheat crust, because anyone who attempts to do real from-scratch baking in our kitchen is a bloody madman, it can only be so awesome. But I just taste-tested it, and it is fucking delicious. So for those of you who care to mimic my amazing culinary success, heap pesto-tomato sauce, really thinly sliced feta, pineapple, olives, rosemary, basil and oregano on top of a whole wheat thin crust. It is fantastic.

In my opinion, at least.

Now back to homework, because I've got a shit ton of it to do. YAY!

2008-04-09T18:02:00.000-07:00

Whoo-hoo!

Which musical is most like your life?

Rent

You are in your prime, ready to face the world. While life still likes to throw you curve balls, you enjoy life to the fullest and no one means more to you than your friends.

Other than that, I have a shit ton of homework (some fun, some not, most due tomorrow) and I forgot my keys at school... So I have to go ask around tomorrow and HOPE that they're still there, because otherwise I'm in all sorts of trouble. Mostly because replacing keys is expensive and I have no money.

So today gets a "meh" rating.

On the bright side, the girl in all my classes who's work is always just a step above mine turns out to be from Brazil. And since every other moderately civilized country has an education system that makes ours look like shit, I don't feel quite so badly for always being that wee bit behind her.

Not that this means I'm not going to step it up. It just means my ego gets even bigger if I can catch up to her work ethic.:P

2008-04-04T13:18:00.000-07:00

I am done with the first week of school!

And although it was fun and my teachers are all sorts of awesome.... Thank. God.

Now I have until Tuesday to do photoshoots, update my website, job hunt, and get my gobs of homework done.

The sunburn I got a few days ago out at Marin Headlands is starting to peel, which is no fun.

Right now I'm cleaning. I did a ton of dishes, laundry, and now I'm working on gathering up trash. I love it when I actually feel productive.

2008-03-28T20:35:00.000-07:00

FIRSTLY: If you haven't already heard of Suicide Girls' lawsuit against photographer Lithium Picnic (or even if you have), guess what? More news! Now his wife Apnea is getting sued as well! Help them out and send them some love.
Viva!

In my own news...

Convertibles have to be the single worst innovation in all of transportation's history. My aunt has one and I rode back home with her. And it was sunny and clear out.

To me, this means enjoying the sun by dozing in it in the fine tradition of all things feline. To her, it means destroying the relaxing warmth and glory by putting the stupid top down for several hundred miles of freeway while I ball myself up in a corner of the passenger seat. Not a very fun way to spend the drive home.

At least it was cheaper than Greyhound. That trip gets worse every time I take it, I swear.

Anyways, I'm home now and starting tomorrow I have at least one photoshoot every day. I'm so excited! I get to start getting lots of photos for my site.:D

For some reason my favorite teacher is no longer teaching the class I was supposed to be taking from him, which really bums me out, because I'm one of those crazy people who likes to make friends with their teachers and spend time with them outside class and stuff. But even so, this quarter will be great if it doesn't kill me first.:P

I've been sleeping a lot today and I'm not sure if it's sexual exhaustion or if I'm coming down with a fever. I really hope it's the second one.

Also I've been really thirsty all day. Thank god the water's free.:D

2008-03-24T11:58:00.000-07:00

So I'm back home for a while. Finals are over, grades are not in and torturing me by their lack of there-ness, and I'm back at my mum's being totally unproductive. And single. Did I mention that part? Single with mixed feelings about it, but single regardless.

I spent most of Easter on a packed Greyhound bus. I was stuck next to these two jackasses of parents. They spent the first portion of the trip swearing every other word, then moved on to getting pissed at their kid and eventually grounding him for not going to sleep at 7pm on a bus on a school night. Once the poor thing finally conked out, they set about grumbling about how he was "undermining their authority" and then proceeded to eat all his Easter candy. I'm also fairly sure they got drunk or high or something about halfway through the trip.

Those are the sorts of people who make me want to never reproduce except for the sake of outnumbering them with intelligent, mentally balanced and moderately attractive people. Genetic narcissism for the win!

I've been working on my site lately and it's officially functional, but my coding mentor has been giving me so much shit over it that I'm going to hand it (grudgingly) over to him, so I doubt it will stay as is for very long. It'll probably be much prettier and less scary once he has a crack at it, though.

Other than that, I've just been busy with modeling gig applications. I joined Model Mayhem and I've been up to my ears in TFCD offers since then, which is all sorts of cool and awesome. I'm hoping I can bulk up my portfolio enough to start getting more paid gigs and eventually start selling prints or something like that...

Anyways, back to being unproductive. Just figured I'd share the fact that I'm not in fact dead.

2008-03-18T16:30:00.000-07:00

After oversleeping by two hours (I totaled seven hours of sleep, so I don't feel completely worthless) I drug my sorry ass out of bed and steeled myself for a long day of studying and all other sorts of random crap.

I still haven't got any of it done. What I DID do was completely rearrange my room, sort through all my shit to get rid of stuff I don't need and finally put my collection of newspaper and National Geographic clippings and woodblock prints up on the wall. There's much more room in the... room, now, and it feels a lot more comfortable and open, somehow. Maybe that's just because I bothered opening the blinds, something my roommate never does.

So my room looks completely different and completely awesome. I felt very proud and manly for moving all the furniture completely by myself, but that got killed by the fact that I put up so many photos and pretty stuff on the wall. In defense of my manliness, however, none of it is friends or family.

Also, my bed's not right next to the door anymore, so I can surf the web, edit my photos and site and look at dirty pictures without worrying if my roommate's going to stroll in in the middle of me oggling Betty Page. Freedom!

My best friend finally called me back today. I've been trying to get ahold of him for days and while he usually calls me back, he wasn't and also wasn't returning my texts, which is weird since normally we talk every day. It turns out that his girlfriend, whom after months of dating he's finally decided to like (unlike me- every time I start liking her she starts hating me), went through his texts and found one from when he came over so we could cuddle (something we also used to do all the time before Ms. Crazy Jealous showed up). And owing to this scandalous development, she almost broke up with him. Again. So he's decided that he'd rather just not tell me until I've been worrying for almost a week. So that's great.

I'm tempted to tell him to call me when the nutjob finally leaves for New York in the autumn. She's a nice girl to most people, but I can't wait for her to be gone. I can't go over and hang out with my core group of friends because she's too busy being jealous.

And now to homework, and whatever else the day may bring. Boo.

2008-03-17T23:58:00.000-07:00

My three hardest finals were today and I think I did well enough on all of them. Granted I barely slept last night, I've been stressed to tears a few times the past weeks and I've been one giant stressball for weeks, but it's over now! Well, almost. Two relatively simple finals left. I'm so happy.

Especially because there was one class I was so sure I was going to fail. I wound up getting an A-. :D

This morning I woke up at five (after three hours of sleep) in order to finish up my final for my morning class. Of course my printer wasn't working, even though it was fine last night. So I took the bus to school (something I never do), got there forty minutes early and managed to pull everything together. My gorgeously sexy and awesomely weird teacher said my work's been excellent all quarter (he even used the word "excellent"). I have him again next quarter, along with a returning favorite and one I've never met but I hear is super duperly cool. I can't wait for next quarter.

Who am I kidding? I can't wait to have two weeks off...

The rest of today was simply filled with mischief and fun.

I also ate way too much today. I guess because I have food in the house again and time to eat. That tends to help...

Well, now to studying and being exhaustedly happy. Tomorrow's going to be another busy day.

Happy St. Patrick's Day! Go get tanked!

2008-03-14T23:08:00.000-07:00

I spent all day on finals and IMing people. I've been so busy on my finals I didn't realize I hadn't eaten until my eyes stopped focusing. But I've been getting quite a lot done.

Even so, I'll be getting up horribly early tomorrow to finish these assignments to print out at stupid Kinko's. And then onto the rest of my finals.

And more friendly and overtly sexual banter via IM.

I can't wait for Monday. St. Patrick's Day! :D

2008-03-13T13:35:00.000-07:00

One final project down. Two more and a few tests to study for left, and then I'm FREE. Free for two whole entire weeks to jack off and do nothing. By which I mean build multiple websites, visit family, and catch up on my gaming and personal projects.

Even so, finals are keeping me ridiculously busy. I had to cancel my photoshoot tomorrow because they're being stupid and final-like.

It's also my best friend and sometimes-photographer's 21st birthday, so send him love vibes for providing you all with silly photos of me. And because he managed not to kill himself barhopping last night.

Speaking of, it's supposed to rain soon. If it does, hopefully we'll be able to get you some shots of me romping around in it (naked, naturally). If not, well, I'll be getting more of my public indecency photos from Greg Berry soon anyways, so you'll get to check out those instead.

Now to finals. Whee!!

2008-03-11T17:53:00.000-07:00

Daylight Savings Time, combined with some probably misguided and certainly poorly time attempt at dieting, is killing me. In my defense, I didn't even know it was Daylight Savings Time until yesterday morning. I managed to ignore the difficulty my roommate was having getting up, the fact that it was dark out when I left the house AND the fact that my DS was an hour behind (I even set it forward without realizing). I am brilliant.

Anyways, finals are killing me all over the place. Mainly because I'm still behind in one of my classes. One of my friends is turning 21 this week. But at least St. Patty's Day isn't until after the quarter's over...

Eesh.

I've downloaded about five video game OSTs in the past two days and at least doubled the size of my music library. I'm listening to all my Chrono Cross right now. It makes me happy.

Now to do homework. I need good grades. Not just for the scholarship money, either. That's just going to buy my sexy computer later in April. :D